Insulting Neil Gaiman

Last night I dreamed that I left a Tori Amos concert to run to the bookstore (???)… 

I wasn’t going to be gone long, but when I got there, I found out Neil Gaiman’s new book, The Graveyard Book, had been released early. A helpful bookseller said I should get in line because Neil Gaiman was there in the store doing a signing, (!!!) I figured it would be too long a line and I wanted to get back to the concert, but then she pointed out the line only had about five people in it, so…

Here I should mention that I was sitting in my office chair from home this whole time – wheeling around the store. So I asked the lady to help me get the chair through the stacks, and I got in line. And there he was, signing books, with only five people in front of me! And then they were suddenly gone and I didn’t know what to say! 

He asked which book I wanted since I wasn’t holding one, and I said, “Any one will do.” (eeeek!) and then he went on about it not being worth the shipping to get such and such or something, and finally signed a copy of The Graveyard Book for me. I was feeling bad that i hadn’t read the new book yet (even though it had just been released that day), but in real non-dreaming life, I’ve been listening to him on audio a lot (HIGHLY reccommend!). So I told him I listened to his audio…and that I really enjoyed it…except, I said, “You do a really bad English accent.”


I don’t remember how he reacted, but I quickly corrected myself and said, “I meant to say you do a bad American accent!” (Awesome! I put my foot in my mouth in my own dreams!!) I back-pedaled, trying to explain myself and not being able to because I really don’t think this at all and I don’t know why I said it! At that point, I think he wanted me to leave, so he began chatting with the booksellers, and I began to wheel pitifully away in my office chair, feeling stupid that I ruined my one and only chance to speak to Neil Gaiman.

This one goes in the nightmare folder. *sigh*

2 thoughts on “Insulting Neil Gaiman

  1. Aw! Poor Emily. On the bright side–at least you’re not filing this in the REALITY folder! But still. I decree that having a nightmare like that has earned you the right to spoil yourself (if you’re like me and use any excuse imagineable to spoil yourself).


    1. Yeah, this one doesn’t even do the nightmare I had last night justice. Um, I couldn’t post that here…too much nudity and fat men for the health of the masses. I’m pretty sure I’m still screaming in the recesses of my unconscious. !!! Why can’t I just dream that Kelly Clarkson is my BFF???

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